Veronika Bódizs • Jan 30 • 2 min read
SPIRITUAL JOURNEY II.
Updated: Feb 4
Part two:
Meditation and Ayahuasca changed my perception of life.
The journey will teach us unique lessons to become who we are meant to be.
Beginnings
Until 2019 summer I was traveling and partying around the world. I decided to launch my clothing line with a girlfriend of mine and we worked for almost one year designing the first collection. She was my closest friend and on the day to sign the contract she disappeared with the whole collection. I was disappointed and I pushed myself deeper into the party life.
I was an occasional drinker but I was out with friends every day therefore I was drinking alcohol daily. This affected negatively my mental and my physical health, and I become intolerant to more types of food. – Changing our diet is just a small part of the healing, change is needed in our mindset and self-image too.
I felt there must be something that I’m doing wrong even tho on the outside and on Instagram it seems like I’m thriving – being young and beautiful and seeing the best of the whole world – but one thing was missing… my connection with my inner-being.
I booked an Ayahuasca retreat and started to prepare for 2 months which included:
plant-based diet
meditation every day
I isolated myself from the outside world (minimalize talking and all kinds of contact)
yoga, workout
Listening to videos from spiritual teachers
No alcohol
During this time I learned peace. We are called human beings for a reason. The change in my perception of life begins. I started to prioritize my well-being over everything else. The feeling of wholeness and inner joy take over my body more and more often, on the way to building a connection with my heart. The picture started to come together: Love is the key. Being still and clearing our mind opens the way for the real knowledge which comes from the heart. When we open the connection with our true selves every act becomes an act of self-love.
"What is this energy within us? Awareness - Love -God?!"
First time in my life I felt safe just being. The more love I gave to myself the more love I was able to express in all the ways toward my surrounding. The whole world slowed down and started to seem like a loving warm place.
What is Ayahuasca?
Ayahuasca is an Amazonian plant medicine that has been used for centuries by indigenous cultures in South America for spiritual, physical, and mental healing. It is made from the bark of the ayahuasca vine (Banisteriopsis caapi) and shrubs of the Psychotria Viridis plant. The medicine is typically taken in a ceremonial setting, with the guidance of a shaman or medicine man. It is said to bring the user into a spiritual realm where they can experience visions, insight, and spiritual growth.
Eye-opening ceremony
On the first night, I sat cross-legged which is a type of meditation posture. I was focusing on keeping my spine straight and my hands on my knees. After taking the plant medicine I felt good and focused within. Here I will not go into the exact details of the visions but only what I learned from them. During this night I learned to place all my awareness on the heart and just breathe deeply and slowly.
Through my visuals, I realized everything is energy and consciousness and it’s made me feel safe to be able to enter deeper into my source. Since this realization, I never felt loneliness because even if I’m alone I feel loved and connected.
I learned that I am much more than my body and that my physical form is only a vessel for my higher self. We have access to an infinite store of knowledge and power and we can tap into this source by going within.
Overall, my first night of meditation was a beautiful experience. It taught me to let go and trust in the power of the universe.
My second night was very intense, a long trip filled with pure enlightenment. I felt ready to fully enter the experience.
Peace – Trust – Acceptance was my leading emotions. At the ceremony, we are led by the medicine man and first, we did a meditation together to calm our minds then when we were relaxed, we took our drinks.
I was At One – I let go of my old self, in a way a part of me needs to die to be able to enter the Spirit realm. I focused on my heart and breathing and my visuals come, I wasn’t in this dimension anymore.
I entered an astral journey. I may once make a video on my visions but here is what I learned:
Trust – this feeling opens our hearts to welcome the knowledge the Universe has to offer. At the moment we stop resistance and wanting we allow the higher consciousness to guide us.
Infinity – I am infinite always was and forever existing. My awareness of my soul puts me at ease. Why hurry when this moment will last for infinity? Why would I do anything I don’t love if I can just simply do what I love?
Self-love – Being in love with the person I created for this lifetime, is the key. Every single part of my body with my wins and mistakes was made by God/Love/Universe/Energy. I realized how much I love myself only when I left my body and I was just a point of existence in the Universe. The human experience is a blessing, it’s a gift including every part of it. It is living life. I feel lucky to get to leave my body to be able to appreciate it. A lot of time we are so critical of ourselves forgetting what real values are within each and every part of us.
Mirror – We have an energetic mirror around our body that reflects our inner world and that’s all we can see. It is ourselves that we see in the world around us. Everyone sees in us what is inside them and we can only see in them what is inside of us. When you think someone is judging you they are just judging themselves. Communication doesn’t exist in the way we believe so, only in energy, everything else is an illusion.
Joy – Everything we experience through our body is a miracle. This whole existence is a miracle and every single moment of it. It is a gift to enjoy with its ups and downs and makes it super fun. The purpose of life is to enjoy the ride.
Is the world around us or inside us?
I think I see the light outside of me but the vision is inside my head. I think I touch the objects around me but it’s my brain that experiences the feeling through my senses. I think I hear the noises but it’s myself who experiencing hearing.
Is the world exist around me or within me? Would this world still be if I were not here?… We all experience it differently, we all experience now differently based on who we are and how we perceive it to be. The answer is that the world exists both inside and outside of us. We are connected to it, and it is connected to us in many ways, but ultimately it is up to us to experience it and make sense of it.
"So just be happy and enjoy the ride because this moment is your soul's greatest creation."
Back to the "normal life"
I decided to explore different ways to connect with my heart. I practice daily self-care such as self-massage, sound healing, yoga, and meditation. I’m taking time to be alone, to listen to my intuition, and to write down my thoughts and feelings. I’m regularly doing yoga, creative activities, and journaling.
I’m focused on building relationships with people who truly understood and supported me and share similar values to mine.
I begin to live my life with ease and focus on the activities which bring me joy.
I learned to recognize my heart’s desires, accept every part of my being and every phase I had through my journey, and express my authentic self.
As I continued to practice these techniques, I started to feel a strong connection to my heart. I began to feel a sense of peace and joy in my everyday life. I now have a much deeper understanding of myself, and I’m able to live more authentically and wholeheartedly.
Meditation
At one is about being in a deep state of relaxation, connection, and awareness. It is a journey of self-discovery, letting go of the past, and opening up to the present moment. It is a place of peace and clarity, where you can experience a sense of oneness with all of existence. As you let go and surrender, you can feel the unconditional love of the universe flowing throughout your being. It is a journey of self-transformation and healing. It is a place of connection and understanding, where you can experience a connection with the divine and a deeper understanding of yourself.
Be in love with yourself. Be in love with the beauty of life, the laughter of children, the wonders of nature, and the joy of living. Each moment holds the potential for new love, new experiences, and new moments of joy.